October 3, 2005
Note: I had literally just finished crapping out this update when I learned that Jerome has apparently chosen to sit out the rest of the tour due to his recent health problems, thereby rendering the entire update completely irrelevant -- or more so than it would have been, that is. Thanks a lot! While in all seriousness I wish him good health and to basically not die, the Meathead Perspective must soldier on, and therefore I'm posting this update anyway. Just pretend it makes sense.
HOLY FUCKING SHIT! NIN.COM UPDATED!!! All right, I know it gets updated all the time nowadays, but I also know that there will come a time in the not-too-distant future when the updates come once per decade, so I'm trying to enjoy it while I can. Leave me alone.
Anyway, the big news is that Jerome "Not Quite Dead" Dillon has decided to pull his shit together and come back to work, as evidenced by the really exciting picture on the left. Now I don't mean to overstate my importance in the grand scheme of things, but I think it's pretty safe to say that I'm the one you all should be thanking. That is, unless you're a Josh Freese fan for some reason, but I'm pretty sure the fire took care of all of them. Obviously my appendix-burstingly hilarious September 19th update smacked some sense into Jerome as he lay in his hospital bed eating his fruit salad. Thanks to the guiding light of my rapist wit, he saw the error of his ways and decided to no longer let his so-called "serious medical problems" or "the looming spectre of the Grim Reaper" keep him from his duty of providing phat beats for Trent Reznor to bitch to.
But I have to hand it to Josh Freese. Josh, of My Two Dads fame, managed to learn the entire NIN catalog in 24 hours (although, honestly, is "Closer" that hard to figure out?), only to be told at the last minute, "Sorry, we don't need you anymore, but thanks anyway!" I imagine the temptation to punch Trent in the stomach to the beat of "Eraser" must have been immense, but Josh was able to keep his cool, because he's such a k00l d00d. I'm sure the fact that Trent could break every bone in Josh's body with his pinky had nothing to do with it, either. Regardless, it should come as a great comfort to those of us who don't like show cancellations that if Jerome gets the liquid shits again, there's a fake Jerome on hand, not unlike the fake Danny Lohner that's been filling in so far this tour.
Hey everybody! It's time for today's Ridiculously Stupid E-Mail?! What good would a new picture on nin.com be without a stupid e-mail to go along with it? Doihaveto, who probably hails from somewhere in Wisconsin since Wisconsin is full of retards, sent us this charming correspondence today:
can you please tell me what the hell in on trents shirt in the new pic ( 10-1-05)to me it looks like a swastika...tell me im seeing things...please..... and seeing how this isnt "news" and even if it was i'd like to remain anonymous.thanks.
Doihaveto's concern is, of course, completely understandable and grounded in reason, as Trent has used his website numerous times in the past to voice his intense hatred of the Jews. Fortunately, he's cut back on the blatant anti-Semitism since sobering up. So if Trent were to appear on nin.com wearing a swastika t-shirt, it would probably mean he's hitting the bottle again, and that would be a bad thing (depending on who you ask). Personally, I think the fact that he owns a t-shirt that's not black is what's truly shocking here, but let's zoom in for a closer look anyway.
Upon closer inspection, it becomes apparent that the design on El Rezzo's t-shirt is in fact not a Nazi insignia, but some sort of writing in old blackletter type. I can't quite make out what it says, but all that really matters is that it's not a swastika. You can breathe easy, Doihaveto!
However, while I still had Photoshop open, I thought I'd take a look at Alessandro's shirt as well, and was none too happy with what I saw:
Not cool man, not cool.
Anyway, it looks like the tour might just possibly straighten up and fly right, after getting off to a Guns 'N Roses-esque start. Since I've only seen Nine Inch Nails a measly six times so far this year, I'm really getting impatient over here. Hopefully things will be all worked out by the time the Reznor wagon train makes its way over here to the Eastern states, so I can once again experience the thrill of rubbing up against a bunch of smelly, sweaty people while trying not to spill the warm, watered-down cup of Lite beer I just spent 12 bucks on. Oh boy, only 30 days to go!
In the meantime, Halloween's coming up, and I haven't made any shitty Flash cartoons lately. Not that those two thoughts are related in any way, but I was just saying.
Check you dudes later,